Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize