you told grandpa to call you daddy
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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