i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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