I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
