you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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