I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
