from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
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