Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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