I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Then he claimed me as his prize for 3rd place in a wing eating contest. Too romantic.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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