what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
