that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
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