Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
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