Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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