If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
How's work?
Spinning.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
