I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed