So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize