i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
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