Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
In America we eat man semen.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
