I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
as a side note pls kill me
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