worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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