I cockslap morals
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
