is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
