despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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