Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
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