College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
