is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Randomize
