Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
