I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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