That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
