So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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