i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
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