remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Randomize
