I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
