go do what you do best...puke behind churches
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
