Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Rule number one to being a good adult: don't use your vagina as an icebreaker. Just some wisdom I thought I'd pass down from experience.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
