my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
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he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
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told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
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