Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
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