how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
