I cockslap morals
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Randomize