I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
im about as happy as oj after his trial
The best revenge is premature balding
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver