Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Randomize
