My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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