We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
