It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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