she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
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