And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Randomize
