I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
