this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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