Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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