i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
