We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Randomize
